New Me, New Blog

Hello everyone! I'm back, well kind of. I'm back on the blog circuit. You can follow my new blog at junesjam.blogspot.com. There are a lot of reasons that I wanted a new start and I hope you can understand that. :)

Goodbye?

There comes a definite point in the semester where you feel the energy drain and a sad emptiness occupying the very parts once full of excitement and vibrant colors. I haven't been writing in the blog so much because it doesn't seem that relevant anymore. It was so necessary to chronicle high school events and life happenings but now I feel removed from that stage of life. I am no longer that girl who pages upon pages of romantic soap opera or the one so self conscience about how the outside world perceives her. It's hard to build upon a foundation that no longer aptly describes your character. I'm torn, however, because this little space I've claimed my own is still dear to me and I don't want to let it just die. I kind of want to jump and leap and cultivate a new space. For the time being, I think I'm going to post to dotpatrol.tumblr.com. If you're curious about my life, I think that'll be the best place to keep tabs. xx

Quintessential Smithie

Hello world! I realize that my presence in the blogging scene varies a lot and that’s because I’ve felt that not much was happening in my life. We have so much information just blasted at us and I don’t want my blog to devolve into a series of meaningless posts just because I feel the need to keep it fresh. However, as of late, I do have some feelings and updates about my life. This is going to be a long post, so brace yourselves.

I go to women’s college. I’ve gotten a lot of eyebrow raises about this statement that just seem to prod why. Why are you at a women’s college in such a progressive era where women are basically men and social issues are a thing of the past? Women can do whatever they want, do you just hate men? Don’t you think #menism is a legitimate movement? You killed chivalry. Let me just get this straight. If you live under a rock and missed the outrage of Mike Brown in Ferguson and all over the world, as well as Eric Garner, social issues do not just disappear because time moves on. Questioning things, being curious, and continuing to keep an open mind are just a few ways to become aware and change the way the world thinks one social movement at a time.

Smith has such a large population of people who are aware of social issues and the underlying problems set up by the construct of the world we live in today. I’m too exhausted to just list everything wrong with the world. I just want to quickly talk about 50 Shades of Gray before calling it a night.

50 Shades of Gray has a female director and screenplay writer, and the original work was written by a woman. This is probably the film with the most female involvement, and in an age where feminism hasn’t touched Hollywood, that is an amazing feat. This movie will also probably be the largest blockbuster of the year and has such a wide audience and pop culture presence. I haven’t personally read the book but I’ve read enough of the Wikipedia page as well as outraged blogs. Perhaps that is the problem with this book. Not enough people are aware that this book is a nicely packaged bundle of abuse and misogyny. It frustrates me so much that this group of women have the power to make a real impact on Hollywood, to show what a team of women can accomplish, and yet they’re making maybe the most misogynistic movie yet. Furthermore, they think they’re making a feminist film. I can’t handle this. We wonder why domestic violence and rape are so common in today’s world and it’s things like this that promote the idea that hurting women is okay if the man is attractive enough and how “romantic” the idea of a man having all the power in a relationship.

I don’t know. Maybe this is why I don’t have a boyfriend. I went on an Ok Cupid date... and that was such an interesting experience. I’m just going to list one example of what it’s like to date a Smith girl.

Me: Wow, it’s really cold. I can’t believe it’s been snowing for so long.
*guy references the Christmas song Baby, It’s Cold Outside*
Me: That song is problematic.
Silence ensues.

He didn’t message me since our . . . date so I’m guessing he’s realized I’m not a naive 18 year old girl who will sleep with him just because.

So moral of the story. Don’t watch 50 Shades of Gray. Don’t give your money to a franchise that gives people the false sense that abuse is the same as romance.

2:26 PM

My favorite project of critical crafting

I've been in a weird slump and I'm sorry for the lack of posts. I feel really apathetic and kind of like an abnormal lump on the sidewalk. I don't know where I want my life to go or what I want to be pursuing. It's normal, they all say, but to me it's not. I've always had some kind of direction and aspiration, a ten year plan. I just want to quit school and go pursue art and block printing even though I don't really have any technical skills. I feel like I'm great at a lot of things on a surface level. I can write, I can draw bearded apples, etc, but I can't do one thing with wholehearted devotion and talent. I'm kind of scared that I'm going to spend my whole life just drifting around always changing my life goal and never really amounting to anything. It's really scary that next year I won't have the excuse of being a first year and somehow life needs to make sense again.

I'm the True MVP: Q&A

It's not Friday but . . . any day is fair game for some questions. I went back to my high school today and it was a bit of an eye opening experience. Not because I've changed so much but rather because the people around me have changed and we are all in the limbo of growing up and finding out who we are so here are some fun questions to describe my experiences so far.

1. Are guys allowed on Smith campus?

Yes. Any other rumors I can debunk about Smith? (seriously though, if you guys have any questions about college, Smith, women's college, women, I love to answer questions..) On another note, when discussing classes with friends, I can definitely feel the hippie liberal arts college nature. I took a class called Reacting to the Past and next semester, I'm taking a class dedicated purely to plant physiology. This is real life. 

2. In what ways have you changed?

Hmm.. I'm still a really geeky, clumsy girl prone to be loud and like sparkly things. I've become a bit more confident in myself and can be kind of assertive at times. I've started taking life a little less seriously. No, I haven't adopted the "yolo" lifestyle where I do a lot of stupid, dangerous things. I've stopped caring about what other people think and have fully embraced the awkward persona I embody. So what if I want to spend my whole life contributing to research on bees? What if I want to plan breathtaking, environmentally sustainable cities? So what if I want to wear impractical things and feel absolutely beautiful? No one can stop me.

3. Makeup routine?
Makeup is a lot of fun haha. I've always loved art so makeup feels like an extension of personality and expression. Step one: foundation, simple contouring, blush. Step 2: eye primer, eye shadow (I start with a super light color, pink/light brown, dark purple/dark brown), eyeliner, mascara, glittery eyeliner pencil (mostly to cover up botched eyeliner). Step 3: lipstick, lipgloss. It can take anywhere from 15-30 minutes. My technique is very simple and probably entirely incorrect.
Makeup love of the moment: Lorac eyeshadow palette.

4. What are you up to?
Summer internships, finishing my submission for Intermediate Fiction Writing, and of course online shopping.

5. Style aspirations?
Colorful. For me, 2015 is all about color. Living boldly and outside the lines. I want more vibrant bright hues, crazy print, really out there fashion.

I'm really psyched about this year. Hope you are tooo. Share your goals with me xx 

Pops of Color

Hello :) I spent the first day of the new year eating Indian food (Indian food is so delicious, another lesson from 2014) and enjoying the seaside breeze. I have a feeling that 2015 will be a pretty great year, full of curious memories.