Saturday, October 19, 2013

How to Have a ME Day

Have you felt stressed out, sad, and hopeless over these past few weeks? I know I have. Although I rarely think about how my emotions are affecting other people when I'm unhappy, your unhappiness and snarky attitude towards others negatively impacts others as well. If you're not emotionally balanced, it's a disaster for all your friends and family. Lately, I've been getting into really serious arguments with S over nothing at all. Sighs, and I'm not the type of girl to get jealous easily but when I'm at such an emotional low, it's hard to not lash out at him. He's been stressed out too and it's just been a constant battle with a couple good moments. I decided to take today as a ME day, a day centered around me, doing the things I want to do. Having a ME day is really simple and a balancing act between things that make you smile and the work you need to get done.

Nom nom nom nom
I started off my morning with reading in bed and breakfast. It's been so long since I've read what I wanted to without analysis and essay writing. I enjoy cooking and baking as a hobby and it was nice to cook up a nourishing yet delicious meal. I'm all for a Nutella, sugar, peanut butter, banana sandwich but sometimes it's better to eat something good for your body. Junk food makes you feel good in the moment but you feel so immensely guilty a few minutes after.

This was a really simple meal that anyone can do! All you need are some fresh vegetables, maybe some cheese, and an egg. I started by whipping my egg and seasoning with some salt and pepper. You pour some vegetable oil on your pan after the pan gets hot. Once one side of the egg is cooked, you slowly flip it using a spatula. It takes a lot of patience but definitely worth it. If you crack two eggs, the egg is thicker and easier to flip but I wanted a light morning breakfast. I cut a little bit of zucchini, potato, mushroom, onion, and a teeny bit of garlic to create the filling. I added some parsley and pepper and salt seasoning. You put in the onion and potato on the frying pan first before adding the other softer vegetables. You always fry the firmer vegetables first. Lastly, I added some cheese to create that ooey gooey effect. With some juice, it was a fantastic way to start off the morning and my ME day.

This stuff works miracles, I'm not kidding for your
face and mind. 
Next, I took some time to catch up on Time Mag and Adventure Time. A ME day is all about finding a smile again, a real smile for yourself. Often times I find that I can fake enthusiasm and cheer around other people. Sometimes it's not faking but rather getting caught up in the moment. When that moment disappears, you're left with your broken feelings again. Rejuvenate your skin and health with some face packs or a scrub of some kind. You can even make your own with honey, brown sugar, cucumbers, lemon, or even oatmeal.

In the late afternoon, I went on a walk in the glorious sunshine. That feeling of fresh air in your system does wonders. It's really important to blast the music you love, have a fashion show with all the pretty things you rarely wear, or even DIY your kitchen ( Happiness comes from within and being constantly frazzled is a sign that you're not emotionally well.

Rant section:
I'm sorry I can't end on a good note. I wish I could say that having a ME day made all my problems go away, but it doesn't. You need time, more ME days, and a feeling of self satisfaction.
This blog has always been my platform of expression and letting out those repressed feelings. I've really been struggling with S. That lighthearted, honeymoon stage is over most definitely. I always thought that it'd never happen to us because we started as very opinionated friends. We constantly got into arguments and hurt feelings before so it wasn't like we were starting off with this idealistic view of each other. Sometimes it feels like a constant to see who can care less, as said by Taylor Swift. I'm annoyed at how petty I am deep inside. It's not the fact that he's busy that annoys me (okay it does a little) but more the fact that I'm NOT busy. Recently, his two friends have come to really bother me. They're sisters and their names both start with T so that's what I'll refer to them on here. I know he doesn't see them all the time. I know he sees me every day. I know I'm being unfair and unpractical. It just seems like I've sort of slid into the background of his mind sometimes. It used to be "hey do you wanna do something Saturday?" but now it's become "oh, you're free? I've made plans but you could come if you wanted, I guess." I get that I'm busy almost every week and people really don't wait for you. He thinks he knows how I feel when it's so obvious he doesn't. Sure, I guess I don't tell him my every mood but he's the one who says it's way more obvious how I'm feeling compared to his hidden feelings. Is it that hard to reply to a facebook message? That "seen at __" is really infuriating especially if that person doesn't respond back (in a general sense). I want to talk to S a lot but when we actually talk, it seems like we're both pissed off at each other all the time. We're working on it, and we'll see. I really need to work on my resolve.
Update: I wish I had a stronger resolve. He said he fell asleep and was walking so couldn't talk to me. When I was in New York, I talked to him every moment I had in the bathroom, sitting on the subway, after a full day's worth of walking. Lesson: I need to work on my resolve.

Hopefully I'll post something more positive later. Bye everyone!

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