Lives of Nitrogenous Bases

Far, far away deep down in our DNA, there is a group of very shallow people. They eat only phosphate and sugar and it's rumored that their food source is the reason to their vanity. In this lovely valley of double helix hills and hydrogen bond bridges, there are two families that are very, very large: the Pyrimidines and the Purines. They are so large and they don't really know who's in their family.

The Pyrimidines have become poor in the last hundred years and all they have to boast about their long gone wealth is their name. Cytosine is getting married to Thymine. She has a ring of double bonded Oxygen. It's the total fad these days. She's a Pyrimidine and she hates it. Cytosine thinks Thymine is a special guy but everyone in this valley knows that she's marrying him for his money. It's too bad that he's also a Pyrimidine and has no money. It's easy to see where she would have gotten that misconception. Thymine is a punk guy who likes to be an individual. He was way more hipster and wore double bonded Oxygen earrings before they were even a fad. His brother Uracil is even worse. Uracil only shows up for holidays because he's busy in another place, far, far away in our RNA. He has two double bonded Oxygen earrings and a little cartilage piercing too. Cytosine was repelled by him so she settled for Thymine. Thymine is a total jerk though and Cytosine found out a little too late. He's the type of guy who spends so much money and time on himself that he makes little Cytosine feel lonely and inadequate. He was there when the Pyrimidines had some money after all.

The Purines have been well off but especially rich in the last hundred years or so. They also show off their double ringed structure. All the Pyrimidines want that special surgical enhancement too but they just can't afford it. Adenine is a great guy. He's down to earth and doesn't have any jewelry even if double bonded Oxygen is the totally cool thing to have. It's great to see a guy who won't go beyond his limit just to match up with the fad. Guanine totally lucked out when she saw that he was single. They connected right away as they were talking about ribose sugar vs deoxyribose. It was love at first sight when they discovered that they both preferred putting deoxyribose in their coffees. Ribose sugar was for nobodies like Uracil. Adenine and Guanine are called the "pure silver" couple and both are so happy with promoting the idea of their wealth. Guanine recently got a double bonded Oxygen ring and shows it off whenever she sees Cytosine around. They have the same ring but it just looks that much better on Guanine. Maybe it's because Thymine totally outshines Cytosine. Poor girl.

Their wedding is coming up and everyone in town is coming for the great celebration. Everyone in this town looks like Cytosine, Thymine, Adenine, or Guanine. They are a perfect society and there is never a Pyrimidine that gets married to a Purine. Although that would be a quicker way for Pyrimidines to get that money back.

The bachelor/bachelorette party is the biggest rage ever. Thymine and Adenine aren't that excited, being guys and all. They only need two Hydrogen attendants and they're set. Guanine and Cytosine are busy outdoing each other. They need to have three Hydrogen attendants fawning over them.  How will the wedding go?

I hope you enjoyed my story about nitrogenous bases. There are a few important facts tucked in. The DNA nucleotide backbone is made by pentose (sugar) and phosphate. A&G are purines and C&T are pyrimidines. Purines have a double ringed structure while pyrimidine only has one. When forming the DNA double helix, A&T line up together and C&G line up together.  The jewelry that each one wears relates how many double bonded Oxygen there are on the nitrogenous base. So it did help me a lot with memorizing structure and such.

The real question is: can I ever spell pyrimidine right? (I first searched it up and then I've looked a previous spelling ever since..)

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Good luck to all you AP Biology people!